今晚

我想哭

感到害怕

害怕寂寞

害怕對話

沒有話題

沒有對像

到頭來

只是害怕自己

什麼樣的感覺

要說不說也都一年了

到現在還是沒有什麼改變

朋友不見增多

但卻慢慢疏遠著

要怪還是怪在我身上

宅在家裡也好一段時間了

常常說沒人找我去玩

想想自己也沒人可以找出去

朋友也就那幾個

而卻不是做工的

就是讀書不得空的

時常被說去找的女朋友什麼的

不過也得有個“女性”朋友方可吧？

我可還不至於是上街隨便搭訕的人

不覺得寂寞？哪可能

我也不喜歡這樣

前些分手的朋友

現在就有的新的羈絆

有人緣的還是比較好吧？

看到都心酸酸的

不甘寂寞的人

都是這樣的感覺吧？

被人說我只說不做
被人說是我讓一切都死亡

以前是你告訴我別被過去束縛
別活在過去

所以我離開這裡
離開我爲了寫下過去而開的部落
寫下我曾經的快樂
以及傷悲
因爲我不再想一直凝視過去

如今你叫我回來
把以前的自己發掘回來

我不想
我不要
你可以說我逃避
因爲我知道我是在逃避

我也非常地明瞭
如今的我
逃避得非常愉快
活得自在

我真的不要曾經墮落的我回來
至少到現在

耀

黑莓x红莓

当blackberry遇上了raspberry...

别问我为什么上传这图片...

我也不知道...

可能无聊吧...

---

finally i noe y tat time i wanna take tis pic aldy...
it shld be it...

went to book fair n bought some books 2day...

end~

4745g

not g460...nor a52jr...

itz 4745g i choose at the end...

personally i dun like acer but tis model perform best of the list...

wif 3 years local warranty...itz really attractive...compare to another 2 model...

i like the g460 most cuz of the design...but sry la...i more emphasize on the performance than the outlook...

so far except the design of the 4745g disappointed me...others were ok...

juz dun hv the time to benchmark my new lappie yet...wait till next wait ba...

going to miss my toshiba very soon...

new equipment~

yea...i got my netbook aldy...
itz a HP 210-1073TU...

but it initially come wif a 1gb SODIMM n also a win7 basic...

not really something i wanted...

so i upgrade it soon after i get it...

swap wif a 2gb ram...then reformat to win7 ultimate 32bit...

n 1st review is tat it really performed very well even it juz a intel atom proc...

another thing...the same day i receive tis netbook...

my toshiba laptop spoil...wtf?!?!

first diagnosis by me is mayb mobo failure or GPU failure...

i predict the repair cost for replacing one of them is around 500~800...

i bring it to toshiba service center the next day at shah alam glenmarie industrial park...

not far but the path bit confusing...

then the gal tell me...shld be GPU failure...n the repair cost is around 1k~2k...

WTF again...somemore wif a rm100 non-refundable error seeking technician fees (dunno wat they call it aldy)...

wif tis range i rather buy a new laptop...

shit...i really miss the toshiba harman/kardon speaker...

itz juz too perfect n really amazed me well...

sigh...i think itz time to let it go...

gonna get another new laptop soon since i really nid it for my study...

n also work for the future...

the laptop in top of my list so far is acer 4745g...

spend so much again tis month...so when i can get my DSLR??

RIP my toshiba A200...sob...

再这样下去我相信我很快会死
难道你不知道吗？

貌似好久没更新了
总感觉做任何事都提不起劲来
真的别说我身边的朋友劝过我多少次
骂过我多少次
我依然感觉很抱歉
毕竟是我的错
而知错却不改且错上加错
时常问我自己
我到底干过些什么事
我总是无法说出答案
答案存在吗
还是我依然寻找着
我也不想想太多
开开心心又是一天
何必斤斤计较呢
还真愧我能说出这番话
不想再欺骗自己
那句是谎言？
我已用我最陈恳最真实的心态来做我自己
我到底是欺骗自己些什么
不想束缚自己
所以还是当回自己

真的担心年末时我的约定是否能达成没有

im at genting right now..
my family went to casino but i insist not to follow..
then my bro went to c c play com n i not interested too..
so i ends up walk around the whole genting n now im sitting at coffee bean.. by myself.. looking at the others..
feel kinda weird to do tis.. but sometimes i feel like really nid some personal spaces..
n still.. missing for someone..

真的表达错了...
我也不想继续下去了...
对不起...

dam long time din update anything...dun hv the feel to do so...

事情并不是很如意...

but nvm...

2day suddenly call by my fren go work at midvalley as event coordinator (crew actually)...

itz really lot of fun working thr...saw many crazy fans hugging...crying n laughing when they got their signature (siao 1)...

then nite got a performance at the garden hotel...

n the ppl r crazy!! moaning outside the pagar like zombie...screaming like monkey...><

after the work...my head bring me go chili's for supper...n now....

im burst...shit...2moro 8 class...

n my leg is broke...

cant take a closer pic...so i took the screen...

look small here...

my crew pass...^^

yes...mayb sometimes my mood really went down...

yes sometimes i will keep silent for a long time...

n yes when tat moment i will keeping ignoring u all...

cuz im not the 1 who will say it out when im facing something...

i dun wan others to share wat i faced...

cuz itz my own responsibility...n i dun wan involve any of my frens...

egoism rite?

ya i noe...

something wont change in my heart...

how long is it been?

itz been the fifth years tis year...

n wat the hell im still hoping for?

the same thing...

mayb i yet mature enuf to let go...

but still childish enuf to hold on...

im the guy who dunno how to speak much...

juz only noe how to b nice...

n others always dunno when i b nice to them...

cuz i nvr said how or wat i done to them...

sound stupid? definitely...

juz hope i had a chance n reforming my speech...

to tell u tat wat i done...n wat im doing...

有时候我会和他吃晚餐

喜欢 也讨厌

喜欢他是我倾诉的对象

讨厌他永远不给我回复

就静静地 听我心里的倾诉

也只有这样的时候我才会认真地思考

认真地让时间吞噬我

两个人的晚餐

一个人的孤单

bye 2009...

being last day of 2009...

seem juz like a normal day...

but after 2moro then turn into a unfamiliar year...

no more 2009...no more turning back...

n i will become 20 years old...

gonna start to familiarize the "2x" age...

n ya...2day is juz like another day...

normal...as usual but special...

happy new year to every1...

还是感觉白过了20年

好空虚呀

又像往年

无法释怀

也无法达成

unboxing dream...^^

yesterday accidently discover that the Final Fantasy XIII Limited Lightning Edition PS3 Slim on the Sony Style store...
it wasnt a rumor at all!! it indeed came to malaysia!!

n it cost rm1738...sound far more exp than a normal 1 (rm1299) but if u include the free FF XIII disc (rm339) n an upgrade of the HDD to 250gb...itz almost the juz like a normal ps3...

tats y i wake up 9 in the morning to go BTS buy it...

once i reach thr the staff told me tat thr only an unit left n it is reserved...

wtf?

"but if u wan to buy now then i can gv it to u 1st" he said...

good!! i quickly bought it down....

front

back

moment of unboxing...

full set view

the game...i really big fan it...^^

having dinner at kaki corner juz now...

n encounter a weird situation...

look at the resit...

we order 3 sirloin steak but somehow they combine it into 1(mayb itz from same piece of sirloin)...

n another somehow the cost of the sirloin steak drop until 38cent per piece (mayb of BSE)...

hey! we got a cheap dinner 2nite...haha!!

人生总会遇到很多三岔口

你给予选择的权利

却失去后悔的资格

路已选

终已确

回头不会见起点

只能欣然地看着那另一道未选

遭受抛弃

但又被羡慕的路途

继续

一错再错

addiction?

nono...itz suiciding...

but still...everything still will moving on endlessly...

if and only if sacrification is make...

在黑暗里开着的灯

一个人

不睡

床垮了

不能睡

却迟迟不换

任由它糟蹋我的睡眠

不睡

寂寞的夜

享受着寂寞

床垮了

心也垮了